Ah, the 1980s. A time of neon, big hair, and questionable fashion choices that we’ve all tried to scrub from our family photo albums. It was a decade of unbridled excess, where the music was loud, the shoulder pads were huge, and nobody batted an eye at things that would get you canceled, shamed, or just stared at in utter confusion today. We look back with a strange mix of fondness and horror at the things we once considered totally normal.
So, grab your Cabbage Patch Kid, pop a Tab, and let's take a glorious, cringeworthy stroll down memory lane. Here are the everyday things from the '80s that just wouldn't fly in our modern, enlightened, and slightly less flammable world.
1. Smoking. Everywhere. All The Time.
Remember walking into a restaurant and being asked, "Smoking or non-smoking?" It was a legitimate question, as if choosing to inhale carcinogens with your calamari was just another menu option. The "non-smoking" section was usually a few tables away from the smokers, separated by nothing more than a flimsy plant and wishful thinking. The air, thick with a permanent, hazy fog of secondhand smoke, was just a part of the ambiance. You could light up on airplanes, in movie theaters, at the office, and even in hospitals. Yes, hospitals.
Today, if you tried to light a cigarette on a Spirit Airlines flight, you’d be tackled by a flight attendant and half the passengers before you could even find your lighter. Smokers are now relegated to sad, little designated areas, huddled together 25 feet from any building entrance like social pariahs. We now understand that "secondhand smoke" isn't just a minor inconvenience; it's a one-way ticket to a whole host of health problems. The idea of your doctor puffing away while explaining your chest X-ray results seems like a scene from a dark comedy, but in the '80s, it was just Tuesday.
2. Letting Kids Roam Feral
In the 1980s, parenting was a bit more… hands-off. The prevailing wisdom was to shove your kids out the front door in the morning and tell them to be home when the streetlights came on. What did they do all day? Who knows. Probably built a fort, fell out of a tree, or played a pickup game of something vaguely dangerous in an abandoned lot. There were no cell phones, no GPS trackers, and no Amber Alerts pinging every five minutes. The only way your parents knew you were alive was if you eventually showed up for dinner, covered in dirt and minor scrapes.
Imagine that scenario today. If you let your 8-year-old wander the neighborhood unsupervised for eight hours, you’d have Child Protective Services at your door faster than you can say "free-range parenting." We now live in a world of scheduled playdates, helicopter parents, and tracking apps that tell you your child’s precise location and heart rate.
Of course, the world is considerably more dangerous for children than it was in the ‘80s. An unaccompanied minor in the wild would be cause for a community-wide panic now, not a sign of a healthy, independent childhood. The '80s kid was a master of self-reliance; the 2020s kid is a master of explaining their whereabouts via text message.
3. The Casual Sexism and Workplace "Humor"
The 1980s workplace was a minefield of behavior that would make any modern HR department spontaneously combust. The movie 9 to 5 wasn't just a comedy; for many, it was a documentary. It was a time when female employees were often called "sweetheart" or "honey" by their male bosses, and "jokes" that were just thinly veiled harassment were considered normal office banter. The idea of a female executive was still a novelty in many industries, and the "glass ceiling" was more like a concrete bunker.
Fast forward to today, where such behavior would land you in a mandatory sensitivity training seminar so fast your head would spin. We have entire corporate structures dedicated to diversity, equity, and inclusion. The "jokes" that flew in the '80s would now result in immediate termination and a public shaming on LinkedIn. While we still have a long way to go, the blatant, casual sexism that was once an accepted part of the professional landscape is now, thankfully, a fireable offense.
4. Dial-Up Internet and the Agony of Waiting
Before we had the entire internet in our pockets, we had dial-up. This magical process involved your computer making a series of screeching, alien-like sounds for what felt like an eternity, just to connect you to a primitive version of the web. Tying up the phone line was an unavoidable consequence. If someone picked up the phone to make a call, your precious connection was instantly severed, and you were booted offline. It was the digital equivalent of someone tripping over the power cord.
Today, the sheer lack of instant gratification would be unbearable. We get annoyed if a webpage takes more than three seconds to load. Imagine telling someone they have to wait two minutes to connect to the internet, and then another five to download a single, low-resolution picture of a cat. People would riot. Our entire lives are built around constant connectivity. The idea of being "kicked off" the internet because your mom needs to call your aunt is so archaic it’s almost charming, in a deeply frustrating sort of way.
5. Using a Physical Map to Get Anywhere
Before Google Maps and Waze, there was the humble, unwieldy paper map. Getting ready for a road trip meant a visit to AAA to get a TripTik, a custom-made flipbook of maps that guided your journey. In the car, navigating was a two-person job. One person drove while the other, the designated navigator, wrestled with a giant, foldable piece of paper that seemed designed to never, ever fold back the same way twice. Arguments were inevitable. "Turn left here!" "But the map says..." "YOU'RE HOLDING IT UPSIDE DOWN!"
Today, we blindly trust a disembodied voice from our phone to guide us to our destination, even when it tells us to make a questionable turn into a lake. We have real-time traffic updates, alternate routes, and satellite imagery. The skill of reading a map has gone the way of the dodo. Hand a Gen Z-er a paper map and they’ll likely stare at it as if it's an ancient artifact, wondering where the "recenter" button is. The idea of getting lost because you misread a tiny street name is a forgotten anxiety.
6. The Glorious, Unregulated Sun Tanning
In the '80s, the sun was not your enemy; it was your partner in achieving the perfect, deep, bronze tan. Sunscreen was an afterthought, something you might slap on if you felt a little tingle. The real tools of the trade were baby oil, tanning reflectors, and Bain de Soleil's "for the St. Tropez tan" orange gelée. People would lie out for hours, literally baking themselves like a potato, in pursuit of a skin tone that screamed "I have a lot of leisure time." A sunburn wasn't a warning sign; it was just the first, painful step toward a glorious tan.
If you tried that today, you’d get a stern lecture from every dermatologist within a 50-mile radius. We are now armed with the knowledge of UVA/UVB rays, skin cancer risks, and the importance of SPF 50+. The pale look is in, and a deep tan often just looks like a sign of premature aging and poor life choices. Lying out covered in oil is now universally recognized as a terrible idea. We've traded the tanning reflector for a wide-brimmed hat and a bottle of mineral sunscreen, and our skin is much happier for it.
7. Aqua Net and the Ozone Layer's Mortal Enemy
Big hair wasn't just a style in the '80s; it was a structural engineering feat. And the primary building material was hairspray, specifically Aqua Net. This stuff was less of a cosmetic product and more of a construction-grade adhesive. You could spray a hairdo into a gravity-defying shape that would remain perfectly intact through a hurricane. The downside? The aerosol cans were packed with chlorofluorocarbons (CFCs), which we later discovered were cheerfully punching a hole in the ozone layer.
Now, the idea of using a product that actively contributes to a global environmental crisis would be met with widespread condemnation. We have eco-friendly, non-aerosol hairsprays and a general awareness that our personal vanity shouldn't come at the expense of the planet. While we still want our hair to look good, we’re no longer willing to sacrifice the Earth's protective atmospheric layer for the sake of a perfectly feathered mullet. The sheer volume of aerosol spray used in the '80s is now seen for what it was: a crime against both hairstyling and the environment.
8. Making Fun of... Well, Everyone
The 1980s were not a time of political correctness. Stand-up comedy, movies, and everyday conversations were filled with jokes that targeted virtually every demographic imaginable. Stereotypes were not just a punchline; they were often the entire premise of the joke. Whether it was based on race, gender, sexual orientation, or disability, nothing was off-limits. It was a cultural free-for-all where "it's just a joke" was the ultimate get-out-of-jail-free card.
In the 2020s, that kind of humor doesn't just fall flat; it gets you canceled. We have evolved to understand that words have power and that making fun of marginalized groups isn't edgy—it's just cruel. The landscape of comedy and public discourse has shifted dramatically. While debates about the limits of humor still rage, the kind of lazy, stereotype-based jokes that were once mainstream are now rightly seen as hacky, hurtful, and completely out of touch. Society has, for the most part, decided that punching down isn't funny.
9. Shoulder Pads as a Power Statement
In the 1980s, if you were a woman in the professional world, you needed shoulder pads. The bigger, the better. They were a non-negotiable part of any power suit, creating a silhouette that made you look like a linebacker. The idea was that to compete in a man's world, you had to adopt a more "masculine" shape. It was a physical manifestation of the "power dressing" trend, a way to project authority and demand to be taken seriously.
Today, that whole concept seems absurd. We now believe that women don't need to look like men to be powerful. True authority comes from competence, confidence, and leadership—not from foam inserts in your blazer. While fashion is cyclical, the idea of using shoulder pads to visually bulk up as a prerequisite for professional respect is a relic of a bygone era. We've moved toward a more authentic expression of power, one that doesn't require you to look like you're about to make a tackle.
10. Recording Songs Off the Radio
Before Spotify and Apple Music gave us instant access to every song ever recorded, there was the mixtape. And the primary method for acquiring the songs for your masterpiece was to wait patiently by your boombox for your favorite song to come on the radio. This required skill, timing, and a bit of luck. You had to hit the "Record" and "Play" buttons simultaneously the second the song started, and pray that the DJ wouldn't talk over the intro or outro. The result was a collection of songs, each with a slightly fuzzy quality and the occasional, infuriating DJ drop right in the middle.
This entire process is completely alien to anyone born after 1995. Why would you wait for hours to capture a low-quality recording of a song when you can just stream it instantly in crystal-clear audio? The mixtape was a labor of love, a curated expression of your musical taste. But the method of its creation was born of technological necessity. Today, we just share a playlist link. It’s more efficient, but you have to admit, it lacks the romance and dedication of waiting all afternoon to perfectly tape "Take on Me."
11. Drinking and Driving—And Not Thinking Twice
Here’s something truly wild: in the '80s, the designated driver was not a universally accepted thing, and the social stigma around drinking and driving was—let’s just say—lacking. Ads warned you, sure, but it was not uncommon for folks to pile into a car after a few rounds at the bar, convinced that coffee or a cold shower would magically erase a BAC that would now land you in jail (or on TikTok, shamed forever).
Fast-forward to the 2020s, and drinking and driving is one of society’s ultimate taboos, complete with ride-shares, MAD DADS, and a steady stream of true crime podcasts proving exactly how dangerous this casual attitude was. Today, the slightest whiff of booze on your breath behind the wheel will get you toasted in every sense—by the law, your friends, and public opinion.
12. Idolizing Billionaires as Unquestioned Heroes
Remember the '80s mantra? “Greed is good.” Wall Street sharks, mega-developers, and venture capital cowboys graced magazine covers as icons. If you drove a Lamborghini, owned a penthouse, or closed a deal with a brick-sized cell phone, you weren’t just respected—you were admired, envied, and probably recruited to give a motivational speech at the local high school. Emulating the likes of Gordon Gekko wasn’t just acceptable, it was aspirational.
In the 2020s, worshipping at the altar of unfiltered capitalism will get you roasted at brunch. These days, billionaires who shoot themselves into space are as likely to get called out for income inequality and worker conditions as they are to get featured in a slick documentary. Social media ensures every questionable business practice is aired out for all to see. Admiring business moguls now takes a back seat to critiquing their ethics, their tweets, and whether their workers have health insurance.
13. Public Displays of Physical Discipline
Back in the '80s, seeing a kid get a swat on the backside at the grocery store drew little more than a shrug from onlookers. Teachers could send you to the principal for a paddling, and at home “the wooden spoon” was a threat more powerful than any time-out.
Try so much as raising your voice in public over little Emma’s meltdown in Aisle 6 today and you’ll have a TikTok star filming you, CPS on speed dial, and several impromptu parenting interventions from strangers. Modern society preaches gentle parenting, positive reinforcement, and endless negotiation—while wooden spoons stay firmly in the utensil drawer.
14. Blasting Boomboxes in Public
If there was a soundtrack to the '80s, it came from a boombox perched on someone’s shoulder, blasting everything from Run-D.M.C. to Def Leppard, whether the world wanted to hear it or not. You made friends, annoyed neighbors, and marked your territory with a wall of sound that could send dogs running.
Today, you’ll get side-eye for so much as letting a YouTube video auto-play in a coffee shop. Headphones are the rule, not the exception. If you lug a Bluetooth speaker onto public transit and treat everyone to your playlist, be prepared for dirty looks at best and a viral “Public Nuisance” video at worst. Sound pollution is strictly BYO-Ears.
15. Taking Pictures—Then Waiting Days to See Them
In the '80s, documenting your life meant hauling around a chunky camera, popping in a roll of film, and hoping every shot wasn’t a blurry mess or your cousin blinking. Snapping away at a family party meant a trip to the photo lab, where you waited days (sometimes weeks) for the developed pictures. The suspense was real—and so was the dread of accidentally getting double-exposed, light-streaked, or total fail prints.
Today, you take 50 photos to get the one perfect selfie, delete the wobbly ones instantly, slap on a filter, and share it with the world in seconds. The 1980s had surprise nostalgia, but the 2020s demand instant results. Our patience for delayed gratification died somewhere between flip phones and Instagram stories.
16. Using Racial and Ethnic Stereotypes as Entertainment
Let’s cut to the chase—TV, films, and commercials from the '80s were a playground of cringeworthy racial and ethnic stereotypes. From breakfast cereal mascots to prime-time sitcoms, some of the most popular media was laced with accents, characters, and “jokes” that would get a modern scriptwriter yeeted out of Hollywood faster than you can say “cancel culture.”
In today’s world, viewers call out stereotyping the minute it hits the screen, and networks swiftly yank anything that even smells like cultural insensitivity. We’re not just talking about cringe; what once passed for comedy is now seen as damaging and offensive, not quirky. If you need proof, try cueing up an old sitcom and watching your living room descend into awkward silence before the laugh track even finishes.
17. Fat Shaming as “Motivation”
Oh, the '80s—when gym teachers, sitcom stars, and even cereal commercials felt comfortable making fun of anyone carrying a few extra pounds. “Lose weight, fatty!” was delivered with a wink, and Jane Fonda reigned on high, encouraging everyone to “feel the burn” (and the shame).
Cut to the 2020s: Body positivity is (thankfully) a movement, not a punchline. Doctors and diet companies know better than to guilt-trip people into changing their bodies, lest they face a social media firestorm. Magazines feature plus-sized models and diverse body types, and public fat-shaming is now considered bullying of the highest order.
18. Wildly Inappropriate Children’s Toys
Some of the toys we were handed in the '80s would never make it past today’s nervous product safety committees—or Twitter moms armed with hashtags. Lawn darts? They were literally metal missiles. Easy-Bake Ovens with heating elements hot enough to scorch the kitchen. BB guns marketed as “starter” gifts. Water Wiggles, which could choke or pummel you senseless. The list goes on.
Nowadays, toys come with more warnings than a prescription bottle, and safety standards have gone from “eh, let ‘em learn” to “don’t blink or you’ll get sued.” Toys are engineered for safety and inclusivity, and if a manufacturer slips up, there’s a viral recall before you can say “Jarts to the eye.”
19. Casual Homophobia in Mainstream Culture
School hallways, movies, and stand-up routines tossed around slurs and homophobic jokes as if they were harmless banter—never mind the real-world impact on the LGBTQ+ community. Gay characters were often side characters or the butt of the joke, if they appeared at all.
Flash forward: what used to be “locker room talk” now rightly sparks major backlash and public apologies. Homophobia in language, slurs, or media isn’t just in bad taste—it’s unacceptable. Representation in modern media isn’t perfect, but at least we’ve stopped letting open bigotry pass as humor.
20. Teachers and Bosses Getting Handsy
In the '80s, it wasn’t all that shocking for a teacher to give you a reassuring shoulder rub or for a boss to “accidentally” pat someone’s back—or lower. Nobody brought up HR or called it “boundary violation”; it was dismissed as being “friendly” or “old school.”
Try that in the 2020s and you’ll be brushing up your LinkedIn profile while sitting through a mandatory HR training on workplace boundaries. The #MeToo movement drew a line in the sand—personal space is sacred, and power dynamics don’t excuse unwanted touching. Physical contact in professional or educational settings is now less “warm and fuzzy,” more “see you in court.”
And there you have it—20 totally normal things from the '80s that would cause utter mayhem (or at least some serious side-eye) if you tried them today. Are we better off now? In most ways, yes.
