I fell in love with Grey's Anatomy in 2010. I was a freshman in college, and my roommate had every single season on DVD. McDreamy was on our tiny TV screen 24/7, and I was instantly hooked. After I caught up, I devoted every Thursday night to the hot doctors of Seattle-Grace-Mercy-West-Grey-Sloan-Memorial-Hospital-whatever-it-is-now. I've witnessed every tragedy (bombs, shootings, and plane crashes included), mourned every death (George left a void that no Grey’s character has ever been able to fill), cried my way through every MerDer breakup, and still, I was devoted to holding on tight on the roller coaster ride that is Shondaland.
And then McDreamy was McMurdered by Shonda Rhimes. It’s still too soon for me to reopen old wounds and discuss why this was an unforgivable act, so I’ll just skip to the bottom line: I quit Grey’s Anatomy, and it’s the hardest habit I’ve ever had to break. Here are 10 struggles I imagine all ex-Grey’s fans are going through now that McDreamy is dead (and Shonda is dead to us).
The new #TGIT promos are so cute. And happy. And it makes you forget that you're no longer a #TGIT participant. But then you remember that Derek is dead and there’s nothing anyone should be dancing about (especially you, Meredith).
Thursday nights will never be the same. What used to be #TGIT is now just another weeknight with no McDreamy.
You see live-tweets and recaps of new Grey’s episodes on your timeline...and you have to resist the urge of reading to find out what you missed. And it's really, really hard.
Sometimes you get the urge to reminisce on the good ol’ days with a good Grey’s binge on Netflix...and then you remember that Shonda ruined everything and there’s no going back. It’s just too painful.
The trailer for season 12 comes out, and it takes everything in you not to watch it. It just hurts too much to think that Patrick Dempsey originally signed a contract to stay on the show through season 12 - and then Shonda killed him before season 11 was even over.
When Made of Honor or Enchanted comes on TV...and all you can do is whisper “McDreamy, you’re alive” through your sobs.
When you hear that Patrick landed his first role since Grey’s Anatomy...and even though you’ve never seen Bridget Jones’s Diary, you’re totally going to see it.
You actually find yourself commiserating with Katherine Heigl...because Shonda Rhimes is a bully and no one deserves her wrath.
Just when you think you’re over McDreamy’s death, a new headline pops up on your Facebook feed...and it’s Shonda and Ellen saying that Meredith doesn’t need Derek. And suddenly you’re crying and yelling at your computer screen all over again. Why, Shonda, why?
Although it’s hard, you faithfully stay away from Grey’s Anatomy...because Derek Shepherd deserved more. The fans deserved more. And hey, Shonda and Ellen: Meredith Grey may not “need” Derek to survive, but Grey’s Anatomy sure as hell does.
(Featured image via Grey's Anatomy)