Deciding on the guest list is often one of the hardest things for the bride and groom as they plan their wedding. Between choosing how many people to have in attendance and nitpicking just which friends and acquaintances should receive an invite, anyone would want to start pulling hair. Luckily, there are some guidelines to take the guess work out of the guest list.
- DO invite close family.
Weddings are, at their heart, family celebrations. Invite your parents, even if you have a difficult relationship with them at the moment, and your brother, even if he mean to you as a kid. This happy time is an opportunity to come together and heal old wounds as you unify two families and start a new life.
However, don't get carried away – a small wedding is ultimately only about the people who really mean something to you. Don't invite great-aunt Hilda, unless you have a close personal relationship with her.
- DO invite mutual friends.
Obviously the people you and your significant other are both friends with should receive invitations. If the groom doesn't know your friend Elsie from summer camp, that's probably because she's not that important to you at this point in your life. You don’t have to invite every person you’ve ever been friends with to your wedding. Stick with the one who have a current role in your life and happiness.
- DO NOT invite people because of family obligations.
As the wedding approaches, your family is likely to tell you that you “need to” invite people because they are family friends, or because they always gave you a birthday present when you were a kid. You have to remain firm. Otherwise, your wedding day will be filled with people you don’t actually care to see. Your wedding is a chance to celebrate your marriage with close family and friends. It’s not the time for your parents to show off to their friends.
- Do NOT invite work friends
Yes, you spend a lot of time with them, and even enjoy some of it. Yes, you may be worried about offending your boss if you don't invite him, but work is work. You have to draw the line between your personal life and work. In some cases, you make real friends at work, of course, but if they are just friends by virtue of their proximity, they are not close enough to be part of the big day.
Of course, everyone's life is different, and it is impossible to capture all these complexities in a general article. However, just remember the cardinal rule that everyone you invite should be important to you and the groom personally. Your guest list should not be filled with obligations or people you’ve lost touch with.
