He wasn't allowed to electrocute himself.
Guess what? We won't let you next time either.
"I wouldn't let him lick the doormat."
We wonder if it said "welcome" and he took it the wrong way.
"He has a cereal bar in his left hand, but he wants the cereal bar in his RIGHT hand."
God gives his toughest battles to his strongest soldiers.
"Microwave ate his lunch."
Just wait until he hears that ear-splitting timer go off.
"Someone ate all the muffins (it was him)."
Okay, we can't lie. We've been there.
"I planted a flower in the pot he gave me."
Appreciate it for what it is! A perfectly good--empty--pot.
"I picked up the cat poop off the floor without her."
True love is being there for the good, the bad, and the ugly.
"He thinks the letters on his shirt are upside down."
Listen, letters are confusing.
"She dropped a receipt we got from the gas station."
Irreplaceable and devestating.
"She found out that I have a name other than 'Mum'."
What do you mean you're a person outside of motherhood?!?
"There was a hot dog hidden in his cornbread."
It is pretty weird if you think about it.
"He finished his chicken nuggets. I offered to get him more."
No, he doesn't want more! He just wants there to be more!
"Her ice cream cake was cold."
We can't lie, ice cream cake is pretty confusing.
"She started crying because I wouldn't buy her the "dolly" movie..."
We think this choice is a lot less traumatizing than buying the "dolly" movie.
