Along with the farmhouse craze, doilies have resurfaced and found their new place, and we have strong opinions about it. Do NOT bring those grimy dust collectors into your home. People may say otherwise, but they’ve lost their way to “Grandma Chic.”
Doilies are completely useless and just add to the clutter in a home. If you’re considering a sudden doily collection, just don’t and say you did.
Recently, people claimed they’re bringing back the doily...but they really need to chill out. If they actually turned those lacey fabric swatches over, you’d see years of stains and grime build-up. Ditch the doily!
Oak is a fabulous wood, probably one of the best. However, those dated oak cabinets need to be refinished with a modern color or stain. Until you do, there’s no amount of decor that can cover the grandma underneath it all.
Many decide to forgo a much-needed renovation and just rock the oak look. However, just know everyone is secretly judging you for your bad decisions.
Not to mention, by this point in those poor cabinets’ lifetime, they’re begging for a new finish. Without a little TLC, you could be facing some dry-rot and water damage. So, put on your readers and take a closer look at those cabinets.
Potpourri, those dusty scented wood shavings need to go--all the way in the trash! You may still see them in select stores but look the other way. Potpourri is out, and has been since 1989. Free up that space on your bathroom counter and toilet tanks and maybe wipe them down with some Lysol every now and then.
If you could hold a blacklight to these biohazard cesspools you would never, EVER, bring them into your home again. Throw the potpourri in the garbage and never speak of it again, we promise we won’t either.
Besides, they don’t even smell that great! They smell like overpowering perfume covering up...well you know. Instead, opt for a nice toiletry spray or room spray. Let your guests take care of their own business when they’re dropping the kids off at the pool.
Precious Moments Angels
Oh boy, you already know what we’re talking about! Precious Moments Angels are those tiny granny gremlins that you can’t touch or even stand too close to! These ceramic tchotchkes are so coveted, you may feel prompted to shroud them in a glass cabinet for safe viewing. We’re here to tell you, it’s the angels brain-washing you. They’d be just as safe in the trash.
We’re here to tell you, it’s the angels brainwashing you. They’d be just as safe in the trash, in fact throw them in the trash today before the granny vibes seep any further into your brain.
If you’re a collector of these precious cherubs, just know that your loved ones will cram them in a box and sell them for quarters to the first buyer available after you check out of this life. Cramming a bunch of figurines on a shelf isn’t home decor, it’s hoarding, and this is an intervention. Sorry!
Pioneer Woman Kitchenware
If you’re looking to make SURE that everyone knows you’re a down-home southern “Ma,” be sure to hit up the clearance aisle at your local Walmart for the Pioneer Woman collection. We recommend going before 5am to beat the traffic.
Nothing says “I’m a Grandma” like overbearing floral cookware! I mean really, you might as well start wearing your glasses around your neck and spying on your neighbors through your mini blinds. Those kids aren’t up to anything grandma!
A nice set of dishes is welcome in every home, but just because they’re “fancy” with those bold prints, doesn’t mean they’re nice. To be honest, these don’t even look southern! They’re overdone and completely not worth the mark-up. If you just love the Pioneer Woman so much (Don’t worry, we love her too) stick with one or two pieces, only!